Reboot

Now I have all this time on my hands. Time I knew just what I'd do with if only I wasn't working. Courtesy of the boss-man, and our "philosophical" differences, that time has come.

This, the 2nd business day of my unemployment, has not left me feeling like curling up into a fetal position, so things are looking up. I find a little comfort in remembering that I didn't want to be doing THAT job forever, anyway. Immense comfort in knowing I no longer have to worry about walking in on the boss-man (BM) or his girlfriend sharing a joint in the comfort of the corner of the far-reaches of the business, nor do I get to wonder why 2 guys went into the one-person bathroom TOGETHER. Ok, yes, I admit, there were "philosophical" differences - my philosophy is that illegal drugs have no business in the workplace, his philosophy quite the opposite.

I'm also comforted by all the outpouring of sympathy & shock from former co-workers and the former owner after my 14-year run. But 6 months with the new owner had me dreading, with every fiber of my being, walking into that place each morning. Oh! That brings up another plus! No more emptying my breakfast into the porcelain throne before walking out the door each morning! 

But unfortunately, no matter how much I prepared for this event, longed for it, even, my self-esteem is in that same place I emptied the contents of my stomach. THAT so-and-so rejected ME??? And now his aerobics instructor can just take up where I left off? Hey, dude, I know you never bothered to find out what I actually did, but trust me, I was using my brain, not my body, ok?  Not that there's anything wrong with aerobic instructors...

So I decided I must brush up on my skills. I am convinced a potential employer will find real worth in knowing I just achieved my highest score EVER in Bubble Shooter! And I have found that I am super good at making lists of things I really, really wanted to do, before this whole "philosophy" thing reared it's ugly head. The execution of said lists? Not so much...

The bottom line is, I have been "gifted" with an opportunity to reinvent myself, find my passion, explore the possibilities and all that kinda stuff,  and I'm just not feeling all that grateful today. This, too, shall pass.  I mean, I fought cancer (won!), lost my beloved mother to cancer after a 4-year battle, made it through 5+ years of active alcohol use by my spouse, lived through 18 months of unemployment due to said drinking, lost a home in the process, and I am on the other side where life is good again, and serenity isn't just a possibility, it's my daily reality. So, really, BM, this is a drop in the old life bucket!

I just can't get over the irony of my spouse losing his job because of drinking and drugging, and I lose my job because I don't. I find (sick) humor in that.

Ok, time to reboot into the next phase on this journey called life!